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Wednesday - 8:54 p.m.

Ok, so maybe the Shirley Manson thing wasn’t correct. I can admit when I’m wrong.

Since the Shirley Manson thing turned out to be garbage, I took another online quiz. This time to see what mythological creature I am. The quiz revealed that I am a centaur, but gave me no little statement about why I am a centaur, or how a centaur behaves.

What's up with that?

Now, thanks to my ongoing search for my true inner self (through the use of online quizzes) I have discovered that in addition to being Indiana Jones and a Winona Ryder character from an eighties movie, I'm also a no-bullshit kind of girl like Shirley Manson, and a centaur.

It's not every day you learn that you're a centaur - whatever the hell that is.

I called Elkie and told her that I was a centaur. She nervously congratulated me.

I then asked her what the hell a centaur was because I knew Elkie would know. Unlike me, Elkie paid a lot more attention in high school. She told me that centaurs are a mythical race that is half horse and half man. They look like horses whose shoulders merge into the upper bodies of men rather than into a normal horses head. I asked her if that meant they could run in the Kentucky Derby without a jockey. Ignoring my question, she explained that the centaurs were a result of a liaison between K'ipha the sun god, and Stilbe, who was a naiad. I sort of drifted off at that point; Elkie talking about centaur sex was making me kind of hot, but also slowly killing me at the same time.

I think I'll go buy a fedora and tell people that I'm Indiana Jones. It takes a lot less time than telling people I'm a centaur.

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