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Thursday - 12:20 p.m.

There was nothing good on TV again, so I spent all night listening to records.

First, I listened to Daybreaker by Beth Orton. The show was really good and she made a joke about testicles that made Daria laugh out loud. I also checked out The Last Broadcast by Doves again. It’s one of my favorites. I first heard There Goes the Fear from that album when I was out in San Francisco visiting Daria. I thought hearing it again might help me out last night.

A week ago I picked up Welcome To Discovery Park by the band Brad in the used bin at the record store where I work part-time. I hadn’t really had a chance to listen to it, and last night seemed like a good time since I wasn’t ever going to be able to sleep again. The lead singer of Brad, a nice man named Shawn Smith, looks like a cross between Silent Bob, Bob Seger, and Willie Nelson.

I also listened to a few Flaming Lips records. They will be here for a show at the end of the month. That show will be beyond good, and last night I was searching for anything to make me feel good.

I'm pulling a double shift today at the cardboard box factory where I work part-time. I was going to go to the Juliana Hatfield show with Mitchell and my degenerate gambler friend David, but I think working will be better for me.

Hours have passed since I read the letter. I feel a little better about it now that time has elapsed, but my mind is still having trouble grasping hold of its contents.

I completely understand why Elkie didn't want me to read it.

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