I went to the thrift store today.

I picked up some used t-shirts from defunct softball teams and a belt with pictures of frogs.

The belt is pretty cool. I'd never seen a frog belt before. It'll make great conversation wherever I eat Thanksgiving dinner this year.

Afterward, Mitchell and I went over to see if Gerald was home. Gerald is staying with his girlfriend Devita and was indeed there. He was also pretty much almost naked.

Gerald had somehow fashioned a welcome mat into a crude loincloth, and it was all he had to cover himself.

Gerald explained that he was out of clean underwear and couldn't leave the house to go out and buy or wash more. He said that Devita was “gone” and wouldn’t have been much help to him anyway. I guess she isn’t very good at doing laundry. We explained to Gerald that he was a moron.

He didn’t like that.

All morons hate it when you call them a moron.

Mitchell was hungry and decided to raid Gerald's fridge. I wish he hadn't because discovering what Gerald keeps in his refrigerator is something I could have gone without knowing.

Gerald had six items inside his refrigerator: four twenty-four-ounce cans of Icehouse beer and two forty-eight-ounce tubs of Land-o-Lakes margarine.

At least the day wasn't a total wash. I did manage to get a cool frog belt.

The worst part was that Elkie never called me like she said she would.

10:16 p.m. - Monday